Monday, August 3, 2009

I'm sorry

My husband pointed something out last night that most certainly has not escaped my attention, it would seem that as of late, I'm not always the nicest person to be around.

Shocking no?

I know I'm sure you all out there think that I just burp rainbows and butterflies but as much as I hate too, I must dispel that notion.

In fact I'm kinda cranky lately. Actually crank pot is probably a better description. And I don't mean to be, really I don't. I'm just well, really freakin kinda uncomfortable and well a tad overwhelmed, not even so much by the prospect of having three kids, but more so by life in general.

I'm thrilled to be pregnant, I am so grateful for the chance to get to have a little one inside me thriving and growing every day. The blessing of this does not escape me. Really it doesn't. And neither does the very very strong likely hood that this will be our last little one.

Flyboy can say with all certainty that this will be our last, however he has given me his blessing to have more children with my second husband. Point taken, however the hormones in me are skewing my judgement a tad on this issue.

I'm sad that my time being pregnant is coming to an end. The kicks and tickles that little boy and I share just between us are about to end and he'll make his grand, screaming entrance into the world, and then like any parent knows, where it goes from there is any ones guess!

Yet at the same time, I've also reached that point in pregnancy where I am uncomfortable no matter what. The kicks and tickles are wonderful but the crushing of my internal (and if I might add I'm thinking pretty darn vital) organs are stifling at times. I can't bend over, I waddle, I ache, the all day sickness and barfing I had for the first 23 weeks is creeping back, I feel short of breath no wonder I'm a cranky. Really its a wonder flames aren't shooting out of my eyes.

I can't decide on a baby announcement, not the end all be all but I just want to get one picked and in place, the boys aren't sleeping great so they are just *joys* during the day, we just had to buy a new car and take on a car payment, oh and the battery has died twice on the new car that we JUST bought.

Not to mention that I just feel lazy and lacking any and all energy to get the house organized and cleaned or dinner on the table so that my dear husband doesn't come home from work and wonder why he married me.

My to do list does have things checked off, but I still feel fairly useless.

Useless and cranky.

21 comments:

  1. You have two kids and are about to push a third out too. You've given up your body and most comforts (umm alcohol?) for it, while taking care of the little ones. Be as cranky as you damn well please.

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  2. I agree with your right to be cranky!!!

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  3. you can be a cranky as you want! you have your hands full 24 hours a day! I don't know how you do it! One is enough to keep me busy. be cranky and be proud!

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  4. You may be "useless and cranky" but you're always able to make me SMILE! :)

    I agree with the other commenters too -- you've done a ton and deserve some crankiness!

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  5. Um. Yeah. I'm fairly sure the last month of pregnancy we shoul all go to a spa where attractive men hand feed us grapes and give massages in a pool and we all have hoverchairs so we don't even need to walk if we don't want to.

    Because otherwise you wake up and go "alright, I gotta get out of bed." And once you make it, you're exhausted.

    And you do it with two little boys, too!!!

    Tell hubby to hush and bring home dinner and ice cream.

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  6. Um. You have every reason to be cranky. Wish I lived closer so I could help you a little. Even if all I did was run around the yard with the boys, at least you'd get a break.

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  7. You are in your last month of pregnancy, I think you are doing just fine! No woman in their last month is sunshine and roses. Not to mention that your extra energy is going into your other boys too. That little one will come into the world, and I have a feeling flyboy will forget all about the crankiness and "unclean" home. ;)

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  8. Oh boo - doesn't sound like fun at all. I'm sorry, dear. Hopefully you'll have an up-day here soon!!

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  9. if it makes you feel any better i have been a crack pot too and i am not even preggers.

    sounds like you have a great reason :) so i say enjoy it and no more sorries!!

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  10. You have everyyy right to be cranky! But ohhh the way you describe missing being pregnant isn't so cranky at all! :)

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  11. Bless your heart! That last month of pregnancy is rather uncomfortable. You can get a pass for any emotion you have right now. ;-)

    And that's not cool about having battery problems in a new car! Come on!!!

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  12. cranky=me too. I don't think I'm as uncomfortable as you, but I don't have 2 boys in my house either. I can say that I feel like doing a whole lot of nothing. If I didn't make appointments and obligate myself to things I'd never get out of the house. I'm so glad this is my last pregnancy!

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  13. In my humble opinion, you owe no apology. Pregnant women don't have to apologize for crankiness whatever the reason.

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  14. Aw, I hope the all day sickness stays gone! I think since you have something growing inside of you it's ok to be a tad bit cranky....

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  15. One of my first thoughts was along Sara's with the alcohol thing.

    You are NOT useless. You sooo totally were my e-rock today and much appreciated.

    You have a right to be cranky. Housing a human and being a jungle gym for two others can't be the most fun of times right now. Do whatcha gotta do sister.

    Right now, Olivia is proclaiming the "Phrone as my own" (potty) and is belting out her new favorite tune..."Farmer Brown had a dog and Bingo was his nameo. S-I-N-G-O." And, yes, we know the sound B makes. We know Bingo starts with the B sound, but it falls in line with the apostle, John Brown (he's apostling when he's not farming, apparently), and one of his verses in the new tessament...you know the one, "it is what it is."

    Gotta scoot...being invited to see her silly poopy. Ahhhh...the joys of parenthood and yours is being added to....Rejoice, sister, rejoice :)

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  16. Oh you have no idea the world I live in. I obly wish I could of found the time to do anything you just mentioned... by #3 my baby anouncement was a picture I took when she was 8 weeks old and then printed it out on my computer!

    Just relax I can only imagine how hard #3 is beating you up right now, and my hubby thought I was lost too but you will return, it only took me a few months to return to my normal crabby instead of preggo crabby!

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  17. Oh honey....i feel you! But soak it up. Before you know it he'll be here and everything will be a big blur for a while. And if you're cranky....you deserve it!!!
    Here's hoping he's 3 weeks early like my little lady was :)

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  18. Oh, I'm sorry! It sounds like you've got plenty of good reasons not to be a rainbow-machine. I think you're accomplishing a lot just by getting out of bed in the morning and keeping yourself and your kiddos alive, personally. . . .

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  19. Take advantage of the cranky time. You earned it! If I couldn't drink and had a giant basketball I knew I had to push out of a place that wasn't even made for golf balls, I also would be cranky.

    What about the airplane announcement? That one was super cute! Or you could just whip some up in your spare time. (Uh oh. Please don't hit me.)

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  20. I *so* wish you lived near me because I would totally bring you dinner and babysit for you. Unfortunately I can't order that on Amazon and have it sent to you, with gift wrapping. :-p

    I'm with lola - you make us smile, and we love you! Cranky and all. :)

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  21. Ugh, I'm feeling right behind you on the crankiness and uselessness. And I have so many more weeks to go!

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