Monday, June 16, 2008

To take or not to take

Social programs are there for a reason, I know this all to well. While in college I worked in a housing project running a summer program for kids (anyone seen the HBO series the Wire, its a charming neighborhood I hung out in) while I was there the poverty I saw was startling. Kids who wore the same filthy tattered shirt three out of five days, kids who sucked down the free lunch because it was a solid, square meal, babies who's diapers were sagging to the ground.

After college I worked in reasonably big city in a program that helped kids with development disabilities 0-3 years get the services necessary to boost them up to where they "could" be. I had a few mentally challenged kids, some kids who were just "late" walkers and talkers, more shaken baby syndromes then I could stomach, but ultimately 95 percent of our case load in the office was drug babies. And many had siblings in the program and no doubt would have future siblings in it as well. When I would do house visits to check on the kid and to make sure services were rolling along the parents would complain to me that their kids needed shoes or food. No child should be without those, every parent should be able to provide that for their child. My beef is that these people had BIG screen tv's, the dish, cartons of cigarettes, so on and so forth. Obviously the money was found for those things. I am jaded by this. I will admit to that. It was the same attitude that I saw while working at the summer program. The ambivalence, I'm not sure if that's the right word, was sickening, just sickening, several nice ass cars were parked at the curb and a hell of a lot of parents were sleeping till noon while my coworkers and I were sweating down wind of a dumpster and making minimum wage.

My point is that when I start to go on and on about people taking money from the state I have a little bit of a leg to stand on. For every one person who I saw who was using the money as it should be, who was using the money to help them while they bettered their situation, I saw 10 who were just sucking it all in and using it selfishly. It annoys me on so many levels. Not only are some people willing to screw their kids over for themselves, but they are sitting around milking the system while my tax dollars support them, and our government is too stupid to figure out a way to clamp it off. Why do we think we can figure out how to keep people out of our country and control our borders if we cant figure out how to make sure people who really need money are getting it and using it correctly?

What brought this long winded ramble up is that the other night flyboy said that someone at work was talking about how they were getting WIC, why people discuss their finances at work I don't know but whatever. Again WIC is there for a reason and many of us enlisted folk do qualify. Would I ever take it? If we really needed it I suppose but I'd cut out a lot of other expenses before I did so. I feel that that is my responsibility as a parent and a upstanding citizen. These people have two very nice cars (one is a ginormous truck the other a car) and a new Harley. I'm no mathematician but you shouldn't be getting any government aid if your ass can afford three vehicles and all new furniture when you moved into new housing a few months ago. I'm just saying. I dont want a kid to suffer and not get the stuff s/he needs but what I dont get is why people think that they can use a supplemental program without making some hard choices. You painted yourself in that corner. You made financial choices, good, bad, and ugly, now learn to live with them.

I'm so tired with people thinking that they are owed something. I am so tired of people not taking responsibility for themselves and their lives. Poor kids... they didn't ask for any of this.


  1. Uggh..this goes without saying..but I am RIGHT there with you. We are not a military family..but the mooching off society is PLAYED OUT. PLAYED OUT I SAY. Dont blame your ancestors, the "system", the opposite sex, the birth control that failed (or if you didnt use any), dont blame hormones, dont blame Dr. Phil. Dont write an email to Oprah.

    Save it. Really, I too am hard assed on this subject. I am not white, nor black, but think I got any handouts, scholarships, or 'free rides'? Ya, think my kids will?
    NOPE NOPE NOPE. It because our income is too high. So we get screwed, just in different way! LOL.

    Ya think I am happy for paying for the degenerates of society? NOPE!

    You know, while I wouldnt say I want my children to have a rich life (they make their own destiny) ....I would like to raise them to get advanced degrees in college, and raise them to be functioning, productive members of society. And I know by the way the are headed so far...they are going to be fine. I have no worries yet...I think the biggest worry will be them dating(and dh is the type of dad that is going to have a "sit down") with anyone that takes out his girls! LOL

    There are too many people milking to system (you know who I am talkin about).

    Since when did having a "special" kid(one that is borderline because the parent is ocd)--not legitamate special---be TRENDY???!!!!!!

  2. Yeah; I remember learning that back in high school. The school I attended was in a low income district, and a good 50% or more of the kids were below the poverty line. I remember many of those kids talking about their new video game system, sporting fancy-expensive jackets and tennis shoes, cell phones, etc., but getting free lunch at school and living in government housing.

    Hubby and I have been speculating that one of way to "handle" the problem might be to make certain welfare benefits short-term only; no more than 3 months at a time, no more than 6 months in a year (or something like that), given that people with true disabilities who really couldn't work might still be provided for in some way. I don't know how well that would really work, but...ugh. I hate that honest people have to pay to support some of the lazy mooches out there.

  3. As I clinch my teeth in an effort to avoiding biting my tongue in two...

    I am the do-it-all girl for the small company I work for, which includes HR/Payroll stuff. I can't tell you how much time I spend fighting unemployment claims because people were too lazy to get to work on time and they popped a drug test so they got fired and filling out wage information for social services. I'm fine with help being made availble to those who need it, but there has to come a limit.

    I'm an adoptive parent and had to prove myself in order to be granted the privilege of being a parent. I think more folks should have to go through two sets of fingerprint checks, drug tests and background checks, home visits, etc. to prove they are fit to be, especially when the Brady Bunch crowd level is reached and they are on assistance.

    Chaps my ass. Stopping now and I know it's a senseless ramble, but it would take up eons to finish it.

    Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out.

  4. Dear Lea, you left a comment on my post ( so I want to tell you that you that you are a very brave woman.

    First, to have a degree that I got and use it to help people, and second, for your family to support our country overseas.

    Our thoughts and prayers are with you. Dee

    ps I couldn't do what you do, just broke down into tears singing songs at Christmas in hospitals (an affair I organized) so I started volunteering for animals. Walking rescued Greyhounds prior to adoption, spaying and neutering feral cats. You just can't make a living that way.

  5. When I worked for the state some of my clients would trade their WIC vouchers for cash so they could buy smokes.

    The majority of my clients had issues paying their electric, rent, and getting food but they had bigger tellies, better mobiles and they were NEVER out of smokes.

    I don't know, the system is seriously flawed. It should be used as a helper to better things..not a lifestyle.

  6. My hours just got cut at work and one of the options that they gave me was to file for unemployment for my lost wages. I couldn't believe it! This cut back is pretty serious for me, but I just couldn't even contemplate doing it. These government programs aren't there to sustain the matter of lifestyle you've come accustomed to they are to help the people that need it. These programs should require personal sacrifice to be able to participate.

  7. There are many reasons why I think we get along in this bloggy world and this is one of them: we think a like on a lot of issues at the SAME TIME!

    I just was talking to a bunch of students' wives that they were getting WIC and other government program funding while their husbands are in law school. I know times are tight but you take out loans or stop demanding organic high priced foods (i know I may be wrong in that sentiment but it boggles my mind!)...also I hate that they call themselves fiscal conservatives that hate taxes but LOVE government handouts!

    Whew, sorry for the rant.

  8. Not to sound as though I am flaming here but if memory serves me correctly if you fall within a certain financial bracket you are eligible for it. It is NOT welfare. I see no wrong in a Tax paying citizen accepting help that then essentially are paying for through their taxes. Many children have allergies and require special formula which costs a small fortune. I took advantage of the opportunity when my milk dried up at 6 months and my child was allergic to lactose. The formula was close to $20 a can and we went through several cans a week. That is a small car payment right there if you add up the cost. Especially if it comes unexpectedly as it did in my case. Yeah, we had two vehicles and some loans and so forth but since I had planned to B. Feed (which I felt was in the best interest of my child) we certainly didn't see this coming down the road. I REFUSE to categorize myself with the "Degenerates" (thanks for that one Spicy mama) of society for using a "Service" that I essentially PAID for as a tax paying citizen. We get tax relief checks and people take those and cash them with out a single thought but God forbid someone take another form of relief without being called every derogatory name in the book! Sorry, but this hit a nerve with me. Once again, WIC IS NOT WELFARE. That is a different program! I really hope people will have a little more compassion on our fellow countrymen!

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  11. Jessica - so sorry for whatever is going on here. I'm clueless. I removed both messages.

    Sorry again for whatever this is.


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