There is something different around here lately. There is a change in the air and I'm not talking about a poopy diaper needing to be changed. Although there are plenty of those.
I hate to think that it's taken me almost five years of motherhood to catch on but lately I'm feeling like a different sort of mom. Shoot I still think there are plenty of times that I'm "that mom" and my kids are "those kids" but the thing is....
I don't care.
Yeah that's it, I'm putting it out there, I don't so much care anymore what on lookers think.
Here's my honest mommy moment. I can't control my kids. Or rather I can't always control my kids.
I know there are people thinking, "your the mom of course you can control them" and to you I say HA! And I have a lovely bridge I'd like to sell you.
Kids will be kids, they will throw tantrums in stores or in the parking lot of school during pickup time (not that that happened to me today or anything), they will embarrass you, mortify you, confuse you, hurt your feelings, and all that can be not just in one day but in 5 minutes.
And bottom line, you can't always control that.
Kids are adapt at figuring out situations in which they have you pigeon holed.
But I have figured something out and maybe I'm slow in coming to this but, hey better late then never, I've figured out that while I can't always control them, I can control my reaction.
Hard to believe but I used to be a yeller. I still do occasionally yell when life and limb are in danger, which with three boys can happen on a regular basis. I would let them get so far under my skin that I just felt crazy and sometimes I snapped. And I hated it.
And somehow, something has changed. I'm more at peace lately.
Of course that could be my underachiever streak coming out. (See I haven't totally changed I'm still totally unable to let things go)
My new mantra is I can't always control them, but I can always control me.
And that's my honest mommy moment of the day.
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