Wednesday, September 16, 2009

And more stupidness

Dash 3 had his two week checkup yesterday. All is well, weighing in nicely at 8.11 lbs and 22 inches. He does have a small case of thrush but really its nothing out of the ordinary. For those of you who aren't up on the infant stuff its basically a yeast infection that they can get in their mouth in the way of small white spots on their tongue.

Don't worry he's not foaming yeast out of the mouth or anything.

Since its in his mouth and well he's latched to me every three hours throughout the day (and night) it can be passed back and forth so the ointment he uses I have to use too.

However yesterday I got excellent medical advice from a doctor who was so old I'm pretty sure when he was on active duty he served in the war of 1812. And was old during that war too. Oh and he had a foreign accent so thick I could barely understand him. So there was a lot of me smiling like an idiot just nodding.


Until he told me to air out my nipples three times a day in sunlight.

Yeah. Lets think about that. Should I just press them up against the window or hang them out? Or better yet I'll just lay in the front yard topless.

The neighbors will love that.

I gave him a strange look, he then noticed my two other children (ahem BOYS) who were being rather obnoxious and asked if I had privacy at home.

HA! I haven't peed alone in 4 1/2 years you think I can air out my nips three times a day?! I'm just going to settle for putting the ointment on them and hoping I don't get thrush. The last thing I need -1 to tell his preschool class is that mommy likes to get some air on her nips.

And he told me to take a 30 min nap daily. That isn't happening either. Actually airing out the nips is more plausible some days then that.


  1. Haha, what a suggestion! Who needs National Geographic magazines at your house!

  2. You seriously had me laughing out loud about that. But think of the stories you'd get out of it from the dashes at school!

  3. hahaha! I recently had a boob infection and I know they are more common in b-feeding mommies than us nulliparous women. I don't think I would survive if I had boob infection and a baby chomping on it multiple times a day. Mad props. I don't know how you do it!

  4. Besides the whole "airing out the nips" thing... a 30 minute nap? Seriously? Does he not see that you have THREE boys?

    Spoken like a true man who's never been a mom. Or even a SAH dad.

    And I'm not even a mom yet and I can figure this out! But I do have three dogs and sure as shootin' I can't pee alone or go anywhere else in the house without an entourage. Kids are even worse!

  5. I seriously busted out laughing so hard that my husband (who was in the upstairs bathroom getting ready for work) heard me and wanted to know what was so funny. Maybe going topless was all the rage for breastfeeding moms during the Roaring 20's? ;)

  6. I was in the library at school when I read this post. I had to catch myself from laughing out loud!! I say go topless in the front yard while you take care of some yard work. Let the boys run around naked!! If a neighbor says anything, just say you are going Natural!!

  7. Ya, I really shouldn't read you while I'm at the office. I think my office mate thinks I'm nuts.

    An old folk remedy for thrush is borax and honey, but I don't know the ratio. I do know it is effective, and the wee one loves it! (assuming the risk of bee allergy is non-existent)

  8. oh my goodness! your freaking hilarious! im cracking up!

  9. lol, you are so funny. i've heard that people can pee alone, but i have forgotten how such a thing wuold be accomplished....

    um, not to be a party pooper tho, but it really WOULD help if you could air out your nipples at least once a day. :) yeast likes it dark and wet...
    maybe after bedtime? just like lay in bed snuggle with baby, but with no shirt?

  10. Oh my gosh, real life is too good to be true. Hilarious story, sorry for laughing at your expense! I wonder how many women could actually follow that advice? Glad to hear the little one is doing well and healthy.

  11. That is right up there with the twisting the nips, continually to induce labor.

    Hope it goes away soon for you both. :)

  12. I just had a vision of all the breastfeeding mommas running around the outside of our houses topless three times a day to fulfill the "airing out."

  13. Haha! Wow! I can't believe that was his suggestion!

  14. This is an excellent day for blogging. Funny ALL OVER the place. I'm dying right now.

  15. Hahahaha! And I thought my doctor was crazy!

  16. What about that purple stuff? I don't remember the name of it, and it turned everything purple, but it worked and was safe for the bambino. Plus, who can't love a baby with a purple mouth?

    I would have asked him if he could watch the kids while I bared my nipples to the window to give it a try!

  17. ha ha ha... that's too funny. I can jsut see you sitting outside with one of those metal-ish sub-bathing things covering your chest so you can hit them with some sunlight. TOO funny!!

  18. Hang in there! I'm still fighting over here. Here's what I've found along my travels!
    *Change your breastpads all the time
    *Wash your bras in hot water - change them every day
    *Try not to put your fingers in -3's mouth (it's pretty well infectious)
    *If he's got pacifiers, drop them in boiling water at the end of the day to clean the yeast off of them - otherwise it'll reinfect.
    * "the purple stuff" a poster mentioned, is Gentian Violet and we found it at a pharmacy for $1.89/bottle. It's messy like crazy, but it's a yeast-killer. I wasn't willing to [essentially] color everything w/ purple sharpie (there's still stains on my kitchen counter and on a few burp rags). I also found a link that said *extended use* [we used it for a few months] was linked to cancer, so now I don't want to use it.
    *Wipe your nips with apple cider vinegar after a feeding (baby probably won't like the taste, so you can wipe it off before a feed)
    *Wipe your nips with water/baking soda paste after a feeding and in baby's mouth after a feed. Just sort of wipe around with your finger (wash them after!).
    *Eat the acidophilus yogurt (natural) because it helps rectify the yeast imbalance.
    *Cut your sugar intake (blasphemy, I know!) because yeast thrives on sugar (as well as warm, wet, and dark places).

    Just passing on the wisdom! :) Hope it doesn't last long!

  19. I love all the advice doctors give us Mom's. Good luck with the nip/thrush situation.

  20. hahaha, you'd think if he's been a dr. for so long he'd have a clue. guess not.

    Speaking of nips (to make you laugh), my bf's mom told me last night that when I'm pregnant I should never ever take off my bra so that my nips (and the whole deal) don't sag once they deflate : / We're not even engaged yet! Hahaha

  21. Wow. So I was just googling eggless muffins because i'm out of eggs and lazy, and link leads to link leads to link and I'm on your page. I say, aw, another military wife. Irony, because I'm working on mockups for a journalistic blog myself... Wait...Marine Corps? Me too... Wait, she calls her kids she WING? me too...wait, East too! Eeeeerie. And all I wanted was a's a small world! Anyway, thanks and good luck healing up! I think that first post-partum week is the most amazing snapshot of the body's ability to heal, because after all, you will eventually be able to sit again!

  22. That IS some old school advice, I do believe I read that in textbooks back in the day when I was in nursing school.

    Gentian violet does work, but as someone else said it does stain like crazy. You could also try Grapefruit Seed Extract, (dilute it to about 10-15 drops per ounce of water and put it on with a q-tip each time after you nurse if you can) I used that as a preventative when I was nursing my kiddo through two southern summers. Never did end up with thrush. Good luck!

  23. Hahahaha I am loving the mental imagery here!

  24. I hope you get the thrush problem solved quick! We have been dealing with it for, oh.. about 9 months now. I gave up on trying to treat it so we will both just live with it. And I got the same piece of advice. I was also told to dye both of us bright purple. If you find anything that works - other than the ointment or suspension - let me know!!!

  25. I have a crazy aunt who did that. In front of my dad. And my grandpa. And 2 of my uncles.

    She's the weird one of the family.

    This post had me :) Good luck with all that. :)

  26. Being so busy with preparing for our overseas move I haven't checked blogs much and noticed you had the baby. CONGRATULATIONS!! So happy for yoU!

  27. my grandmother in Germany told me the same thing.... and it worked. I wasn't able to that for that long, but even a few minutes here and there... it works. lie on the floor, so no one can look through the window at you. first thing in the morning is the best. sorry... but it does work.


  28. I stumbled on your blog a couple of months ago, and have been lurking ever since.
    you are so. stinking. funny.
    I had my third child on 9/13 and love your post-partum posts.
    I'm totally putting your button on my page.

  29. Wow. Really? Did he actually think that one through? Sunlight? Okayyy...

  30. hsahahhaha Oh my god. That's hysterical. Good luck with airing out the nips! ;)


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