Tuesday, May 31, 2011

closin up shop

In 2 weeks, actually 12 days, I'll be infertile. 

Granted its by choice but still I'd be lying if I didn't say its running thru my mind a fair amount lately.

I've been very lucky when it's come to baby makin'.  Very very lucky.

I told flyboy it could take us months to get pregnant with the first two dash boys and what do you know, the first time was the charm both times.  Between dash2 and 3 we suffered a miscarriage, which in it of itself was a horrible blow, if you can believe it, just 10 days after the miscarriage there we were pregnant again.  I'm mertile fertile like that.

But here I am, about to turn 31 in a few months, with 3 beautiful, granted very stubborn, very spunky, very very alpha male kinda boys, going to go in for a hysterectomy.

Now don't get too panicky for me, I'm not losing the ol' girls {those would be the ovaries}, so I'm still gonna be all kinds of hormonal, just the uterus is gonna go.  Cause honestly, its not working so hot lately.

I'll spare you all the gory details and trust me, they are gory, let just leave it at the fact that I re-define, monthly, what a heavy period means.  And if your thinking that a hysterectomy is drastic for periods than clearly your imagination hasn't done it justice.

I've tried other things but really the only two options that are left are ablation and a hysterectomy and really, in the end both mean no more babies, so why not go with the one that will finally end the misery of leaving a blood trail around town. 

Wait was that too much?  Cause that's how its getting lately.  And I have tan car interiors so we're getting down to the wire here folks.

We had always said that as far as kids go 3 was pretty much that magic number.  In an ideal world more kids would be great, but in this world, money, time, and sanity, while it maybe highly overrated, are somewhat limited.  A few have said that maybe we'll want kids once he gets out of the Marine Corps, maybe, but then again, that's six years from now, dash1 will be 12, dash2 10, and dash3 7, would we really want to start again? Probably not.  

Not to mention, could the world handle another dash brother?  I mean including flyboy thats a lot of testosterone for me AND the world to handle.

I've been told that I'm pretty young to be yanking organs out, I get that, but at the same time, our family is complete.  And hey, since we had 'em young, we'll still be young when they head out to tackle the world on their own!

Rumor has it that there is indeed, life after kiddies.  I mean, I'm still YEARS away from that but its a helluva thought, enough that while I might look fondly at little snuggly babies, flyboy and I are moving on to the next stage of family life....

That would be the stage where your child's activities cause the family calendar on the refrigerator to look suspiciously like something out of a war room. 

So in 12 days my baby makin days will be over, and while its a bit to take in... I'm actually ok with it.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

House rules

Every house needs its rules.  Sure family start out with the basic set rules, but all the good meaningful rules develop over time.

Without further ado I give you the flyboy family rules....

1. One must wear pants to the dinner table. A shirt may on certain meal days be optional, but pants, pants are a requirement for food.

2. No socks in the bath.  No matter how much fun you think a bath with socks will be, they can not and will not be worn in the tub. Ever.

3. Do not pop balloons in the car.  Nor is the car the time or place to try out your animal balloon making skills.

4. No talking about bodily functions at the table. {We had a "what came first, chicken or the egg" discussion at the table the other night and flyboy did not find it amusing when I put forth an equally as debatable question... which came first, the fart or the poop? Having three boys is changing me as a person.  A lot.}

5. No holding people down to fart in their face unless this is your punishment.  In that case, buck up and take it like a man.

6. No face shots at close rang with a nerf gun unless you are prepared for #5.

7. Do not ever, ever, roll out your playdough on the carpet.  EVER. {Again.}

8. In order to sit on my bed and most especially my pillows, you must be wearing underwear. {This is directed at my kids not my husband.  They think its hilarious to sit on my pillows naked, thankfully my husband does not.}

9.  Never, ever, shove your fingers up someones nose for them to smell them.  Also, keep your fingers out of peoples mouths, no one wants to taste whatever is on them. EVER.

10. Ice cream, while it is delicious, is not to be eaten with your fingers while standing in your underpants on a chair with the freezer door open.  {This rule is strictly pointed at dash-2}

That's it for now.  I know there are more, the list is ever evolving too, by the time the boys are in middle school surely the list will be up to 100.  Or perhaps these are just the 10 solid rules of life. Could be...

Monday, May 16, 2011


I'm kinda tired.  And stressed.  Scratch those, and sub in exhausted.

Lately I've been a bit frazzled, I'm quick to stress, quick to snap, rather than seeing the joy in the moment, I feel anxious to get all the taskes done.  {If my husband is reading this I'm sure he's wondering what tasks!}

My boys are getting older, that has a lot to do with it.  No longer are our days spent puttering around the house doing tummy time and playdates.  One kid has soccer, another has teeball, homework needs to be done, cookies need to be made for snack and for the Kindergarten bake sale, oh and the 5 spreadsheets for the Nursery School Board need to be done too by the way. 

The house needs to be cleaned, laundry done at a cyclic rate {how is it that 3 boys can easily create 2 loads a day}, dinner should probably be made BEFORE bedtime, not to mention the other stuff of mommy hood.  Love, kisses, hugs and cuddles.  As delightful as those are they slow a mom down. 

That.  Right there.  What's wrong with that statement?

That's the crux of motherhood.  The love, the kisses, the cuddles, the rest, well, it needs to get done but which is more important.

I'm not going to lie either, I'm in the "over" portion of the roller coaster about military life.  Ever notice how its a roller coaster?  Its great, you can do it, then bam, I don't know if I can do this anymore, when are we done, etc.  {Flyboy has his own version, "I'm staying 20+, lets go for retirement, here's the game plan", than bam, "I'm punching tomorrow"}

Flyboy's had a bit of a wonky schedule lately, he's re upping and has a crap ton of leave to use up, because well, he never gets to take it, so he's putting his foot down and dammit, he's taking it, in little week chunks at a time, so he's been around, but who are we kidding, he's still gone a lot.  Here's where I'm going to get whinny, I don't want 5 days, I want 6 months.  6 months of normal living. 

6 months of going to work but coming home to help with homework, bath time, bedtime.  6 months of weekends together.  6 months of a partner to lean on. 

6 months with no where to go but home to us.

But that's not our military reality.  Never has been never will be.  So we keep on doing our spurts, here and gone.  Here and gone.  It should be normal by now but instead it just seems so exhausting.

But hey, only 6 years left, 6 years is a cake walk right?

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Annoyances with a side of bewilderment

There are days I'm pretty sure I should be living on an island somewhere in the Pacific all by my lonesome, from the way my husband used to describe Wake Island, laying in a hammock drinking beer, it doesn't sound like such a bad life.

That and people annoy the living bejezzus out of me from time to time. 

I'm actually relatively good at letting some things go.  I think military life is good for that, when one is running around taking over the slack of a parent who isn't around, you get pretty good at picking and choosing what is going to ruffle your feathers.  But then.... then the little things just sneak on in and annoy me.

Top of my list these days:

-people who idle outside of a store while waiting for someone inside. 

Now if you want to sit in your car with the darn thing running when gas cost $4.09 knock your socks off.  But here is a brilliant idea.  Park in a spot and keep your eye on the door you inconsiderate moron.  Because when you park in front of the sloppey part of the sidewalk  people in wheelchairs and pushing their kids in carts cant GET IN THE DAMN STORE! 

You know I once saw a guy parked ON the sidewalk in front of the Target?  I will admit I actually stood there and stared because I couldn't quite believe it.  {And in case your wondering, no, no he did not seem to like me staring at him and waved at me.  With one finger.}

But really.... who PARKS on the SIDEWALK? What he couldn't fit his suv thru the doors?

- Much like the one above, people who park in handicap spots so they can just "dash" in real quick.  I noticed a tow truck did this today.  His tow truck was too long for the spots so he pulled horizontally in over both of the handicap spots AND blocking the ramp to the sidewalk.  Really guy?  You couldn't have done the same thing four spaces down?

- Cops driving at warp speed talking on their cell phones.  We live in a handsfree state and since we also live in a broke-ass state they are seriously cracking down on talking while driving.  I have no problems with this, if your breakign the law and get caught than pay up.  I'm much more for this than taxing the hell out of people.

Anyways, the other day dash2 and I were walking into the gym {I was pushing dash3 in the stroller in case you were wondering if I left him in the car} and we were almost plowed down by a cop who was going well over the village speed limit of 25 mph.  And he was talking on his cell phone.  And his lights weren't on so don't give me the it was an emergency line.  If it was he should have turned on his siren and lights.

I respect cops but bottom line, if I have to follow the law so do you.  And please don't run over my kids and I.

- Now this one isn't so much an annoyance as it is a bewilderment.... people putting soda in their baby bottles.  I saw this not once but twice this week.  {and in an even more shocking twist I was only out at Target twice this week. How did THAT happen?!}

Here's my thinking, if your kid needs a bottle they don't need soda.  If you feel they are old enough for soda  than they probably don't need a bottle.

I love me my soda....I'm not an anti-soda persona, its my crack, hence why my kids wont be touching it for quite a while.

There you go. That's what's going on in my head these days.  If you need me I'll be looking around for a deserted island.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

A request from a food allergy parent

The week before last I was cleaning thru dash1's bookbag, because, as any mother of a kid in school knows, when you want the skinny on what's going on you head straight to the bookbag. 

How that child can rat hole away so many things in there is beyond me.

In his bookbag I found a little construction paper card that said "sorry" on the front.  My first instinct was "oh crap what did my kid do?".  I opened up the card and read "I'm sorry I almost made you so sick". 

Ummm.... what went on at school?  Clearly I was not in the loop here.

I ask dash1 about the card and he told me, very matter of factly that 2 little girls in his class got up from their table at lunch and walked over to his peanut free table and waved a PB&J in his face. 

Dash1, who in case your just joining me has severe allergies to eggs and peanuts, handles his food allergies very matter of factly.  He doesn't really freak out or take them lightly, he called over his teacher who was in the lunch room and let her know what was happening.

When I asked what happened next he summed it up rather nicely, "oh mom, Mrs. --- was PISSED."  Apparently the girls got a talking to and the parents were informed.  I will admit, there is part of me that wonders if this was enough, but then again they are only kindergarteners.

One mother came up to me the next day at school and told me that her daughter was so upset over getting in trouble she started throwing up and she had to come get her at school and "just hold her for the rest of the day.". 

Forgive me, I'm not moved.  {Sidenote- quite frankly, this mom is weird anyways.  Really, she took her kid out of school at 2:00 to "get her pretty" for her 6:00 birthday party.}

Bullying is no joke in school anymore.  Dash1's school has had no less than five assemblies on it,and in my mind, waving a pb&j in the face of someone for whom peanut butter is lethal is on par with pushing them around on the playground. 

And speaking of food allergies... did you know last week was food allergy awareness week?  {I know I know I should have blogged then, when I had the mojo blogger was down.  Yeah, that's right, I'm passing the buck.}

Here's what schools AND parents, both the parents of the allergy kids and the non allergy kids need to do.  We can't just slap up a sign on the classroom door of a peanut with a line through it, that's not enough.  Sure a kindergartener gets that that means NO PEANUTS but do they really understand why?  Probably not.

We need to explain to them, on their level what it means. Some people can eat peanut butter all day long, when you eat peanut butter your tummy thinks its awesome, when other kids eat it it can make them very very sick.  There, that's the start of a talk.

Food restrictions due to allergies can be seen as bothersome or an overreaction by non-allergy parents.  I've know this first hand.  I saw the eye rolls and sighs when the teacher announced at orientation that there were peanut allergies in the room, trust me folks, its no walk in the park for us.

Not to mention a lot of time kids with severe food allergies also have other medical issues that go hand in hand.  Dash1 also has allergy asthma, which during a flare up is a nightmare.  The afternoon after the sandwich was waved in his face he had an asthma attack and his oxygen levels plummeted.

At our school, peanuts aren't outlawed all together, there are no peanut snacks allowed IN the class but the lunchroom is still fair game.  What is needed is a level of understanding on the part of all involved.

I can't speak for all allergy parents, but I know that I've tried to do my best to safe guard my son.  He knows what can happen if he ingest an allergen, he knows that he needs to be vigilant and take precautions. If your a non allergy parent, take the time to talk to your kids, somewhere an allergy parent is reading a really long list of ingredients and will thank you for it.